but I can’t sleep. Isn’t that always the way?
I overcommit. I overextend myself. I always have. I think I can do these grandiose things… then I crash and burn, spectacularly. Like the time I got a III on my oboe solo. At DISTRICT. Because I was trying to take an oboe solo, a clarinet solo, a vocal solo, play in 4-5 ensembles, and accompany 4-5 other people. I think the only I at state I got that year was my vocal solo, out of all that! Ridiculousness to ever expect that much of myself, and that was 20+ years ago. Why do I keep doing this to myself???